Thursday, June 12, 2008
This is the best/most hideous cake I've ever seen. I hope it tasted as good/bad as it looks. I'm sure some eager pack of toddlers took no time to face plant that one.
So now that we've been around the block a couple times, here's what's in store for Cultural Flotsam this year:
"Laughing one minute, crying the next, often for no apparent reason. That's what you can expect from your emotionally fragile 2-year-old. These seemingly bizarre mood swings are simply the result of your toddler's struggle to take control of his actions, impulses and feelings.
Your toddler wants to learn how everything works. However, he still lacks many of the skills necessary to accomplish this task without inflicting harm on himself or others. As a result, the bulk of his exploration time is spent testing limits -- yours, his and the environment's.
Although it may not seem that way often, slowly but surely, your 2-year-old is learning self-control. But don't be surprised if he saves his worst outbursts for you. Your toddler doesn't trust other people the way he trusts you, so he waits until you arrive to push the envelope."
Cheers to all my regular readers and to all those who have posted comments. I love you all.
Friday, June 06, 2008
The world is a darker place today. This week, as I was cycling to work, I noticed an ad on a passing transit bus for the new Mariah Carey album, the dubiously titled E=MC2. The absolute gall of this astounds me. My first thought, however, was: I wonder who would come up first on a Google search for E=mc2, Einstein or Mariah?
I can barely grasp the complex formulations of the theory of relativity any more than I can stomach the overblown warblings of Mariah, but I can tell you what I think the E stands for in her version of the equation (think poo).
When the execs at her record label brainstormed over what to name the new album, I can imagine the conversation may have gone something like this: "Now let's see... if the Energy contained in any object is equal to the Mass times the Speed of Light squared, then naturally, the Music contained in Mariah is equal to Obscene Profits times Millions squared. Bingo!"
The optimist in me hopes that maybe somewhere in the universe some 14 year-old girl will look at that album and not think: Gee I wish I was that skinny and filthy rich, and instead think: Gee, I remember seeing that E=mc2 in a textbook somewhere. I'm going to Wiki that. And bang, a budding physicist is born.
It's not impossible.
Brush up on the real E=mc2 here